I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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