She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
