I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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