i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
