Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
