tell your sister to shave her snatch
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
