Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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