She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
You smell like stripper and shame
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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