I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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