It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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