she woke up with a sticky ear
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
