she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
