Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I love having hate sex.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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