What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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