ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
