just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
