You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize