...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize