belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
