I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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