You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
