talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Pants 0. Shit 1.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
