Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
We're not piercing ourselves today.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
