Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
