I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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