So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
