I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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