Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize