New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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