I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
