So many bounce houses so little time
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
