Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
where does the pee come out of this thing
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
