just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
