everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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