The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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