I need help removing her.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
