I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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