Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
