I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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