And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
