is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Randomize
