I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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