I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
