Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize