My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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