You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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