Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
