he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize