he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
