I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
