Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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