There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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